My Damn Day

Today I am mad at myself. I have been so distracted all day!! Did not do anything that I intended to do. And I didnt even help my teammate much while we were working on our final project. And the damn project. Circuits that worked when we initially designed and tested them... DO NOT WORK NOW!!! AAAAAAAARGH!!! What is it with these damned circuits. Well.. maybe a little bit of screaming will help me relax a bit.

Anywayz... today.. I think I have made some important decisions. Have to see if I stick to them. Putting this in writing may hopefully make me stick to them. God Bless me and give me the courage to do what I think is right. Thank You:)

Some pics from my thanksgiving trip

My Cousin's Backyard.... after the snowstorm

My Neices.. making a snowman

Chicago skyline at sunset.. a meagre 4:23pm even after Daylight Saving Time was implemented

Yours truly......at the museum campus

ChooseChicago.com: Chicago Events, Hotel and Restaurant Information and More

ChooseChicago.com: Chicago Events, Hotel and Restaurant Information and More

I spent the gobble gobble day showing a friend around Chicago. Actually... 2 friends.

it started on Wednesday. I was planning to rent a car and go to Chicago. my neighbour wanted to see Chicago.. as he hadnt ever seen the touristy side of Chicago. Some other friends were supposed to come... but they couldnt make it. However... we had a last minute addition in this freshman guy who had contacted us before he came to Purdue.. and who we had helped out... by way of advice.. but never actually met. Anywayz... the car was booked.. and Wednesday came up nice and decent. It was raining a bit all day... but hey.. a li'l bit of rain never hurt anyone. right?? So.. we left at 3:30pm... so that we could be in Chicago by evening... go to downtown.. get some Indian food at the famous Devon street there (it's the "Little India" of Chicago). Well... mother nature had other plans. I ended up driving through the season's first snowstorm (my very first time driving in snow... and the other 2 guys dont have licenses here... just my luck!!) Well.. 6 hours later... the three of us trudged into my cousin's place in Chicago.. having eaten at a taco bell on the way... as Devon Street seemed unachievable at the rate we were moving at.

The snow was beautiful. We had a quick breakfast... played a bit in the snow... and headed out to downtown.. to see some stuff. So.. Sears tower.... the museum campus.. buckingham fountain... and navy pier were all explored... with lunch at a subway on the way...We got lost a bunch of times...no thanks to a hopeless set of navigators;). The free street parking on public holidays was a great boon. The weather was nice and clear.. and we got some great shots. Then... off to Devon street to grab a quick bite... and then... back to Purdue. This time.. the lack of snow on the roads let me get back in 3 hours....(though we did get lost... and roam around Chicago due to misreading some signs.. and some terrible navigation again...) Now... am reading a nice book in my warm room munching on some danish cookies that we picked up on the way...(The fourth K by Mario Puzo... seems an interesting read)
Some pics will be up in the next blog:)
hope you all had a great time. Happy Thanksgiving. And Thank You... for being what you have always been.. a nice visitor to my blog... and a great person. I know you may have your faults.. but you definitely have a great bit of good in you... so Thanks for being that special person:)

Updates

Ok... it's been a while since I have posted anything about my life. So.. maybe some updates are in order...even at the risk of posting twice in one day.

Life has become sort of monotonous...sleep..eat... do homework... go to classes (or atleast some of them)...sit on the computer... play games...yeah.. you get the point. Nothing exciting as such.

Well, I did go for a show last weekend... a Diwali show. Diwali (short for deepavali), the Indian festival of lights... celebrating.. as always... the victory of good over evil... and also...to welcome the goddess of wealth. In India, people, much to the chagrin of environmental activists, burst a whole bunch of firecrackers. This causes all kinds of pollution. Birds are burnt to death.. and other animals cringe at the high decibal 'bombs' used. One is supposed to light up the house so as to show the path for the goddess of wealth. Diwali was one of my favourite festivals.. not least because of the firecrackers I burst. That's one thing I miss.

However... at Purdue, the Indian Student Association put up a very fine show with Dances and skits. So...I went for it. I decided to dress up and wear my 'sherwani' (a long flowing Indian dress). I do have a few pics....but my dad says that pics of me posing with girls is harmful for my marriage prospects. So... that picture shall not be posted on my blog. And that was the most exciting part of my week. err month.

Thanksgiving break is coming up... and I am planning to go to Chicago... watch the parade. Just for a few days... and head back to get other work done.
Well... thats the update.

These are a few of my favourite things

The sound of music is a movie I can watch multiple times. I like the songs... and this song is no different. "My Favourite things". If Julie Andrews can list out her favourite things...I thought I should too....you know, it is always good.

- greenery / scenery after a rainfall when the dust has settled down and everything looks like it has been washed.
- The smell of damp earth... when it rains after a hot spell
- cuddling up under a quilt with a nice book when it's cold outside.... and warm inside.
- The faint smell of perfume... as that beautiful girl walks by
- The salivating love of a dog being scratched on the neck
- An unexpected mail or a message... just saying hello:)
- the warm gurgling of a stream...or even the drip-drip of water after a downpour
- The sound of waves crashing on the beach
- The dark blackish colour of the sky just before a thunderstorm.
- and the bright sunlight after the clouds part
- little kids laughing and playing
- A true smile...
- Especially when given by a stranger just walking by...
- Sunrise after a night of staying up......
- a song that matches my mood...
- walking in the rain (in warm weather)
- A heavy snowfall that leaves everything white
- A full moon in the sky.... surrounded by stars
- a bright blue sunny day
- the sudden change from barren trees to trees laden with flowers and leaves in spring
- dew .. or water as such.. on the plants.... early in the morning...
- chirping of birds at dawn
- the look on the face when a person gets teased:D >:D
- Grandparents
...

Somewhere, over the rainbow

Somewhere over the rainbow
Way up high,
There's a land that I heard of
Once in a lullaby.

Somewhere over the rainbow
Skies are blue,
And the dreams that you dare to dream
Really do come true.

Someday I'll wish upon a star
And wake up where the clouds are far
Behind me.
Where troubles melt like lemon drops
Away above the chimney tops
That's where you'll find me.

Somewhere over the rainbow
Bluebirds fly.
Birds fly over the rainbow.
Why then, oh why can't I?

If happy little bluebirds fly
Beyond the rainbow
Why, oh why can't I?

- Wizard of Oz
music by Harold Arlen and lyrics by E.Y. Harburg

Narcissus and goldmund n My career...an introspection

Google Print: Narcissus and Goldmund

I just got done reading Narcissus and Goldmund by Hermann Hesse. Before this I read Magister Ludi (aka The Glass Bead Game) by the same author..and Sense and Sensibility by Jane Austen. While reading those books, I wondered why I was taking so long to read them. I thought I was getting too busy. But the truth struck me today. Those books...did not move me... this one did.

I was reading this book in the bathroom. I like reading in the bathroom. Somehow...I feel more at ease. There is no computer to distract me.....nor ppl. I also think my deepest thoughts as I stand in the shower...oblivious to the huge wastage of water and time. Actually...it is a wastage of water...not of time. Despite it being 4 am, I am happy that I spent the last half an hour in the shower...contemplating the book I just finished and my life in general.

This book...kept me interested as it kept moving at random. It was this randomness that appealed to me. Another thing was some kind of botherhood that I felt with the protoganist. Goldmund...or golden mouth...was a wanderer. Women could not resist him....he was a veritable Don Juan de Marco. Nothing could hold his attention for long. He was a hard worker though..and strived to be happy. He longed for true love...that he ultimately experienced ...only...through his "Mother". She was inside him.....a representative of his mother who had left him when he was a baby. Yet...in her..he also saw the holy mother....and all the women he met in his travails as a wanderer. He was also an artist... and could visualize things..but never think mathematically or logically.
No...I am not irresistible to women...nor am I as great a lover as to be compared with Don Juan De Marco. But nothing holds my attention span for long. I work hard...yet only just enough. And I am still seeking that something that I want. I am searching for that goal in life...that very same thing that Goldmund spent all his life searching for. This comes at a very troubling stage of my life. On one side...I want to do graduate school. I know I am good enough to do decently well..if I put in half an effort. But..somehow..EE doesnt move me. Atleast not all of it. I enjoyed vast parts of it...but right now..right here...I am not sure what I liked most. I know I am not a mathematician. I cannot think like one. I am a decent programmer....sufficiently logical...I enjoyed Physics (mechanics) in the past..and yet...I dont know if I will in the future. And I have to finish applying to colleges.
On the other hand....I can try for a job. I read my resume recently..and suddenly realized...I had been expecting the interviewer to see my resume and decipher my hidden signals to determine what I had done. I have always dreamt of a recruiter..who would take one look at my resume...recognize my true potential ... and hire me on the spot. Oh..I have been rudely awakened multiple times...but yet...I persist. But now..that I have realized this..I guess I will make more of an effort to sell myself. But I dont know if I want to..... I havent really worked that hard at getting a job.
Then..there is the ever present college work. Keeping me on campus till I get tired...then home to watching movies..and lazing.

I think I am a wanderer ...coming to Purdue was one step in my wanderings...it had taught me a lot. And now, I feel I am getting ready to move on. But where to? what is it that moves me? What it is that really moves me....
For my interviewing class, I read that I was supposed to do a complete self analysis and realize my strengths and weaknesses. Only then could I find a job that fit me well. And thats what I was thinking when I thought all of the above in the shower....
Maybe I shld list my strengths and weaknesses

Strengths n weaknesses (Plz...no comments on this part unless u have something to add...I am just listing them for myself. I think I know this about myself pretty well... )
- Am decently intelligent. That is my major source of ego. And my problem. For I think that it must be apparent...that I dont need to sell it. After all, selling oneself is like....boasting...something that people do not like. And I boast too!!
- I am lazy..yet work hard enough to do that which I need to.
- I am highly principled...atleast when it comes to judging myself. My guiding principles, I like to believe, are... honesty, integrity, faithfulness, doing my own work, being sensitive to others..love for my family.....cannot think of more...are there more?
- I am selfish. In that I put my personal happiness as most important. But then again, I find happiness in making other ppl happy:)
- I am almost a perfectionist. What I do, needs to be perfect....now if only my attention span was better.....
- I talk a lot. Yet...I am a poor communicator. I do not know how to "handle" people.
- I appreciate change. I strive for it. I need it to be happy...to not get bored. I strive for getting to look at things with a different view. Not successfulll all the time...but the attempt is made

I find myself a contradiction. I cannot be very artistic... in fact... I never was a great critic of art. To me, it is the big and the magnificent that is truly noteworthy. nature...with it's tremendous variety..it's immenseness... totally mesmerizes me. Thats why I like photopgraphy....good photography captures a beauty that exists. So...I cannot handle abstractions.
Yet...brain games have ceased to interest me. Once...I found them interesting.... but now...I am indifferent to them. I am not motivated enough. I actually am beginning to prefer building physical skills....skills that I didnt care much for till now. Am I actually losing my brain? is it wasting away for lack of exercise? Frankly...I dont really care.

Now...I am almost getting bored with my attempt at self analysis. Maybe......some other day.....once again....

Till then....

Life, no wife... no strife!!Yay!!;)

heyya pplz
whats going onnn?? Things have settled down a bit for me... and thats the way things should be:). I have been procrastinating, however, on a few things related to college.. and I need to get down to them pronto... but then.. it's also been a case of a whole bunch of work that I HAD to do. well.. it's all relative.. and I know I should have been a bit more hard working.

Well.. yesterday...I saw this video of some guys who did some funky stuff around campus. One guy dressed up as a banana...and walked around campus. every so often... 2 guys dressed as monkeys drove up on a van and "abducted" the banana. They also chased the "banana" through a few classes as they were in session. One report I heard that half a class left after these guys left the classroom. Apparently some people had come into the class with the sole intention of watching the incident!! If u want, u can watch it here: Linkie . Be warned that it is a 63 MB file in wma format and may not play properly as it needs a lot of bandwidth.

Contemplating on my life, I have realized that I often do not sleep early. As gemmak said the other day, some people just cannot sleep early.. and thats my problem. I stay up late doing nothing as such. And then...I am so tired all day long that I end up not getting any work done. So.. now...I have begun to take a few naps... in case I dont get enough sleep. This helps me get more done:):):).

As regards my whole "craze" for girls... somehow.. things have totally mellowed me out. No longer do I feel any inclination to go out and try. It is a kind of slow anticipation.. that what must happen...will happen. And I really dont have any time right now... so no empty mind for the devil (or even cupid) to play around with...This somehow feels much more familiar:)

Last Friday, I went to the local night club with some friends... as I was sick and tired after a horrible week. My parents called just as I was leaving.... and I spoke with them on the walk there... and I told my poor mom that I would drink. How could I resist it... when I told her that I was going to the night club, she got a bit flustered and said "So, you will go there and drink coke?". Now... I mean... she was just worried I know... but I had to tease her..so I said.. I would go and drink some alcoholic drink;). Looks like my mom took it pretty well (she is used to my teasing her I guess)... but my dad apparently got worried... as he spoke with my sister and asked her to "handle" me and keep an eye on me as he was worried;). My pooor dad. The thing is.. I no longer have the disgust for alcohol that I had earlier. Back then, alcohol was something that had , in a sense, destroyed some of my loved ones. Today...I realized.... that they had just been unable to handle the sweet poison that alcohol is. And it had consumed them. And this had affected the entire family:(. Well... anywayz... I realized that behaving stuck up on alcohol only isolates u from the public... and if someone wants to drink.. they may as well do so. Who cares .. right? Unless it is family..or close friend:).
To make a long story short...I dont drink...because I dont trust myself enough to control myself once I start. Peer pressure does exist to some extent.. but now, I can actually hang out with my friends who drink..even when they go drinking:). And thats fun in itself. I can always act drunk at a night club and dance like I was drunk. I dont have any sense of coordination anywayz;)

lemme put up a few pics...that I took recently..:
In San Francisco.. when I went to visit my sis... (click to see larger size)


View from my window.. a few days ago... (click to see the full pic)


Now.. the tree above has lost all it's leaves.. but the picture reminds me of the beauty. All that was missing was a little child..sitting on that golden floor... reading a book. Or even a girl... :)

Have a spectacular weekend people:)

P.S: I have seen a few good movies recently (in the past few weeks)...and havent mentioned earlier in my blog...or so I think. Well.. see them if u can...
No Man's land
Pride and Prejudice - the miniseries
The mating habits of the earthbound human
The Boondock saints
When Harry met Sally
Paycheck


P.P.S: Some new songs in playlist... and some removed...